- Patrick, Lilly, and I met their parents at the preschool the twins will be starting at, and we met the teachers, saw the room, and generally got a little more comfortable. I'm interested to see how they do once we leave them, but they're pretty okay so far.
- V and I took our first "pole fitness" class. Yes, it was fitness, but the name still makes me laugh. Stripper classes, here I come! It was fun, though. My shoulders hurt.
- We're going to the Renaissance Faire tomorrow, even though there's an 80% chance of rain. We'll be wet wenches, I suppose.
- I'm trying to find something to do (that pays) on Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday afternoons, since I will now be done work by 12:30. Hope that works out, as...we kinda need it to.
- My new favorite phrase is "electric asteroid full of tigers," thanks to Sierra. There's actually serious commentary behind it: go read her take on gender martyrdom.
Friday, August 31, 2012
Goings-on
Lately...
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Two
I just happened to realize it was August (well, not for the first time in the past four weeks), and checked the date of my first post: August 28, 2010. Quelle coincidence.
Happy anniversary to me! I've definitely slacked off this year, but I think that's okay. I'm still yammering away, anyway.
Glad you're all here with me, whoever "you all" happens to encompass!
Happy anniversary to me! I've definitely slacked off this year, but I think that's okay. I'm still yammering away, anyway.
Glad you're all here with me, whoever "you all" happens to encompass!
Location
I feel like most parents are generally concerned about knowing where their child is at all times. I definitely like to know the vicinity in which Patrick and Lilly are playing, but what I find more important is knowing that they know my location.
If we get separated, I have a lot more tools at my disposal to find them, then they do to find me. Being more than three feet tall, for instance, and not consistently walking into people (cough-Lilly-cough).
We went to the children's museum today, and I generally let them have the run of the place - though they always stick in one area at a time, and we all move on together (mutual unspoken agreement, I guess). When we got to a new area (the balls, the kids' town, the water), I would pick a spot to sit down, and verbalize to them, "I'm going to sit right here." They may then get out of my sight, but they know where to find me.
I do the same thing at a playground. We all walk over to a table or bench or something remotely comfortable, I set my things down, tell the kids that's where I'll be, and then they run off and play. It lets me not freak out when I can't see them. It gives them assurance that they can get to me whenever they need to.
Think about it: adults seem to always know where kids are, but the kids don't necessarily have that same assurance. I'd hate to be a kid and have to hunt around, even a little bit. My two just backtrack to where they left me, and I'm sitting right there, doing a crossword puzzle or something.
It lets me feel secure about them, and relax in peace. Win!
If we get separated, I have a lot more tools at my disposal to find them, then they do to find me. Being more than three feet tall, for instance, and not consistently walking into people (cough-Lilly-cough).
We went to the children's museum today, and I generally let them have the run of the place - though they always stick in one area at a time, and we all move on together (mutual unspoken agreement, I guess). When we got to a new area (the balls, the kids' town, the water), I would pick a spot to sit down, and verbalize to them, "I'm going to sit right here." They may then get out of my sight, but they know where to find me.
I do the same thing at a playground. We all walk over to a table or bench or something remotely comfortable, I set my things down, tell the kids that's where I'll be, and then they run off and play. It lets me not freak out when I can't see them. It gives them assurance that they can get to me whenever they need to.
Think about it: adults seem to always know where kids are, but the kids don't necessarily have that same assurance. I'd hate to be a kid and have to hunt around, even a little bit. My two just backtrack to where they left me, and I'm sitting right there, doing a crossword puzzle or something.
It lets me feel secure about them, and relax in peace. Win!
Saturday, August 25, 2012
Pictures
It's not often that I can post pictures, but I just loaded the ones from my (very not smart-) phone onto the computer, and I take a lot of pictures of the kids from the back. So, enjoy a few!
And for bonus fun, what happens when you bring home a random dollhouse to paint...
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| Patrick feeding the ducks |
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| Me getting astronomically better at braiding Lilly's hair |
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| One of my favorites. L-R: Danielle, Lilly, Laura |
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| Calcifer (in it) and Mei Mei (skulking by) |
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| Lottie (sorry for the sideways) |
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Break
Lately, I've been in conversations with two good friends of mine, each of whom is concerned about their marriages (to other people, not each other). One wants desperately to fix what's broken and try again. One wants the freedom that comes with being alone. Both are heart-wrenching in their own ways.
V and I have a good thing going. Honestly, I don't know how. Part of it is that she can be an angel (and also sometimes a doormat, which I have to warn her against). Part of it is that we learned early on how to communicate. We were born in a fire, of secrecy and risk and other lovers and more external pressure than anyone should have. It's a near miracle we made it through; now, it's become the foundation that we know we won't break.
Some people are made for monogamy. Some for more open relationships. Some for partner-less-ness. All of that is fine. It just hurts to watch the growing pains of people finding what they need. Of people accidentally getting hurt in the process. Of people not knowing how to communicate, and digging their hole deeper.
I never want to stop appreciating what I have. Appreciating the emails that start, "I don't really want to tell you this, but..." Appreciating the trust that enables me to say, "I'm broken, again, for the millionth time, and I need you." Appreciating that I can tell her, "I'm a mess; get out of here and save yourself," and her response is to roll her eyes and say, "You've tried that before. It didn't work. I'm still here."
To those out there who are struggling: My heart hurts for you. I'm so sorry for the difficulties in life. I want to help.
To those out there who are on surer footing: Never stop being grateful. What you have is a gift.
V and I have a good thing going. Honestly, I don't know how. Part of it is that she can be an angel (and also sometimes a doormat, which I have to warn her against). Part of it is that we learned early on how to communicate. We were born in a fire, of secrecy and risk and other lovers and more external pressure than anyone should have. It's a near miracle we made it through; now, it's become the foundation that we know we won't break.
Some people are made for monogamy. Some for more open relationships. Some for partner-less-ness. All of that is fine. It just hurts to watch the growing pains of people finding what they need. Of people accidentally getting hurt in the process. Of people not knowing how to communicate, and digging their hole deeper.
I never want to stop appreciating what I have. Appreciating the emails that start, "I don't really want to tell you this, but..." Appreciating the trust that enables me to say, "I'm broken, again, for the millionth time, and I need you." Appreciating that I can tell her, "I'm a mess; get out of here and save yourself," and her response is to roll her eyes and say, "You've tried that before. It didn't work. I'm still here."
To those out there who are struggling: My heart hurts for you. I'm so sorry for the difficulties in life. I want to help.
To those out there who are on surer footing: Never stop being grateful. What you have is a gift.
Friends
Real thoughts are coming later, but for now, I present you with Children who Want to Play with Their Friends:
Tuesday...
Lilly: Can we go play with Laura and Danielle?
Me: No, because you both have a cold. You're doing a lot of coughing and sneezing, and we don't want to get them sick.
Patrick: I think I'm going to be all done coughing now.
Yesterday...
Patrick: Can Laura and Danielle come with us to the nature center?
Me: I asked their mom, but Laura had a little fever yesterday. She got a tiny bit sick.
Patrick: Well...she could just sit on a bench.
Me: That doesn't sound very fun for her.
Patrick: Um, she could sit on your lap?
Points for persistence, kids, but sorry. Maybe next week.
Tuesday...
Lilly: Can we go play with Laura and Danielle?
Me: No, because you both have a cold. You're doing a lot of coughing and sneezing, and we don't want to get them sick.
Patrick: I think I'm going to be all done coughing now.
Yesterday...
Patrick: Can Laura and Danielle come with us to the nature center?
Me: I asked their mom, but Laura had a little fever yesterday. She got a tiny bit sick.
Patrick: Well...she could just sit on a bench.
Me: That doesn't sound very fun for her.
Patrick: Um, she could sit on your lap?
Points for persistence, kids, but sorry. Maybe next week.
Sunday, August 19, 2012
Busy
Thursday to the zoo
Friday to V's parents
Saturday to where my cousin's wedding was
Sunday at the wedding and back to V's parents
Tomorrow, driving home
It's been good, though. My extended family has been lots of fun; it's been probably five years since I've seen most of them. A small phone conversation, while we were trying to meet up with some cousins for dinner, involved the line: "Well, there's six irresponsible 30-somethings in a Yaris, who've been drinking for a few hours."
That was a slight exaggeration, but yes. It was quite a fun evening. The wedding today was busy and chaotic and enjoyable and high-energy. Bride and groom looked great, everyone seemed to enjoy themselves, and V did an awesome job catching it all on film. (Metaphorical film. It's a DSLR.)
And my family never batted an eye. Sure, I know most of them do disagree with us, but everyone was friendly, and welcoming, and excited to see both of us.
Plus, I got to corral people for pictures, which means I got to play wedding coordinator, which I love!
(Now to get home tomorrow and return to normal (also busy) life on Tuesday.)
Friday to V's parents
Saturday to where my cousin's wedding was
Sunday at the wedding and back to V's parents
Tomorrow, driving home
It's been good, though. My extended family has been lots of fun; it's been probably five years since I've seen most of them. A small phone conversation, while we were trying to meet up with some cousins for dinner, involved the line: "Well, there's six irresponsible 30-somethings in a Yaris, who've been drinking for a few hours."
That was a slight exaggeration, but yes. It was quite a fun evening. The wedding today was busy and chaotic and enjoyable and high-energy. Bride and groom looked great, everyone seemed to enjoy themselves, and V did an awesome job catching it all on film. (Metaphorical film. It's a DSLR.)
And my family never batted an eye. Sure, I know most of them do disagree with us, but everyone was friendly, and welcoming, and excited to see both of us.
Plus, I got to corral people for pictures, which means I got to play wedding coordinator, which I love!
(Now to get home tomorrow and return to normal (also busy) life on Tuesday.)
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