Tuesday, April 3, 2012

No baby

I don't want a baby right now.  I want a preschooler.  And I want him/her in order to make the right decisions, as opposed to the ones Patrick and Lilly's mom make.

Let me back up.  I do love their mom, and I know she wants what's best for them.  But in her mind, they aren't three and a half.  I think they're more like two and a half.

We have such different clothing styles.  I really, really wish I could buy the kids' wardrobes.  Because what I have to work with this summer?  Sucky.

I think they'd thrive in preschool.  Now.  Not when they're almost four.  For goodness sake, Lilly wants something to challenge her, wants a fight.  She'd love an environment where she was actually engaged.  Instead, we go to the zoo, and we go to the park, and we take walks around the neighborhood.

Those are all good things.  I think we should keep doing all of them.  But I also really wish they were in some more structured activity.

Their mom asks me to keep a schedule with them that she doesn't stick to on the weekends.  That lack of consistency is hurting them, I think.

When I started with them, I considered it lucky that I'd found a family whose views I could mesh with.  It was true then.  Apparently, the older they get, the less we mesh, and it's becoming a source of tension.  Not between us, but within me.  And that's coming out, in my lack of patience with the kids, who are acting out, because they aren't stimulated and on a regular schedule...

I hate nannying.


  1. Ugh, that sounds terribly frustrating. I'm sorry you're struggling and I'm sorry the twins are missing out on all your great ideas. :(

    1. Life is definitely improving - and one of the ways I know I work for an amazing family is that I actually told their mom a chunk of this, and her response was that I must be in a really tough spot, she totally understands, and she couldn't do what I do. How cool and reassuring is that?!