Growing up, V and I were both told in our churches some variation on "there's a God-shaped hole inside your heart." Youth groups warned us not to fill that hole with boys, or drugs, or even "holy" pursuits like academics. Only God could perfectly fill up a person.
Last night, V commented that there is in fact a hole inside people. It's called adolescence. It's not God-shaped; it's not any shaped. It's just a part of life - I'm not even sure it's a hole. Teenage years can suck. God may help, or may not.
It's taken me more time than I'd like, but I finally feel free of the "God-shaped hole" myth. I finally feel free of the God myth, for lack of better terminology. Not that I don't believe there is a God - in some form, somewhere, in some level of involvement with humanity. It's just that, for the first time in my life, I feel totally comfortable not giving a rat's behind about any of it.
One of the other common church stories is the idea of coming to Jesus, being saved, and having a burden lifted off that you didn't even realize was there. Well I'm here tonight to bring you the message that the exact opposite action will give you the same result. I have rarely felt so free, so relaxed (in this regard), as in the past few months.
I am, at long last, comfortably areligious. Comfortably letting all rats keep their rear ends when it comes to religion. I don't have to think about getting up on Sunday morning, every week. I don't have to think about whether my actions hurt or please anyone other than myself and my fellow humans. And amazingly, I don't have to think about guilt. It's finally disappeared.
I love it. I've caught myself lately just pausing, taking a deep breath, and feeling the lack of stress and guilt and worry and expectations. It's downright freeing.
You might get a lot of slack from this post as the world is full of people who will want to condemn you for such beliefs, but I for one think it is brave and wonderful that you found freedom. I felt the same way when I found my freedom. :)
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